THE FINAL ACT
Things change, and as I find myself nearing my seventh decade on this crazy blue ball, I am wondering if maybe I should change direction.
Have I taken the work as far as it can go. Are people sick of me yet. Have I stayed at the party too long.
Years ago I was asked the question: Who is the audience for your perfumes.
Having been a visual artist most of my life, chasing narratives and being difficult in every way imaginable, I knew that the answer was (for the most part) outside my area of expertise.
I had always been somewhat surprised at the range of different personalities who found their way to my work, both visual and olfactory.
Much of what I do is about keeping my head down and just doing the work. I can spend days, weeks alone working out a thing, a small thing that leads to another small thing. I am always pushing, and ripping things apart to get to the core of what really matters to me artistically.
I am not a joiner, or someone who needs to be out and about. My work is a solitary thing, it is personal and I wear it close to the heart, and then when it is time I let it go and move on to the next thing. There is never any separation anxiety. when it is done, that's it.
Even now after so many years, I find it perplexing that people find their way to my work, and with all of its quirkiness and difficulty, they stick around, enjoy and relate to it. That anything ever gets done at all is a miracle. I could literally spend my entire life in process.
So this audience, this brave group of people who come here and say yes. They are the real heroes. They are the ones taking all the chances, while I am merely circling, in a holding pattern waiting for a place to land.